Friday, October 28, 2005

Merry Fitzmas

Deck the halls with balls of liars...Merry Fitzmas, Mr. Bush.

Thursday, October 27, 2005

By Far The Coolest Thing I've Seen Today

Music video produced entirely on an Apple II+ in Applesoft II.
Hat tip: Boing Boing.

Sunday, October 23, 2005

Re: William G.

Suprisingly, I got an actual comment on my William G. post:

Joe wrote:
Actually, Paul, William G. is a nice guy and a talented artist. I think you misread his critique of PvP and Penny Arcade. If he seems resentful now, it's because of the huge number of PvP and Penny Arcade fans who sent him hateful emails after the article.

Everybody has a right to express their opinion, and nobody should be subject to the kind of hazing Bill has gotten for doing so.

Thanks for writing in Joe.

William G. may well be a decent guy in real life, but his Internet persona is one of a hateful creep. I do recall seeing some of his art last spring, and it indeed was rather good.

However, as a critic he's a hack. His critique of PA and PvP was, to put it mildly, crap. If I recall correctly, he was saying that as an artist these comics were poor because they lacked good art. That was a rather weak point...Just because every frame isn't an infinite canvas fit for an HDTV that takes a week to draw doesn't mean the comic can't be a good comic, or a great comic.

For example: The reason Penny Arcade is a great comic is because of the writing and characterization. When you read a PA strip you have an instinctual feeling for who these people are. That's what great comedy is. Gabe and Tycho are like Abbot and Costello...They play established rolls and those rolls are central to what make the gags work. While PA and Garfield are both essentially gag comics, Garfield sucks because the characters are so bland that the gags become unfunny. The point is that the gags are the joke, the characters are the joke. While the art isn't mind blowing, it is crucial to the characterizations. Gabe and Tycho would not work as stick figures.

But none of that is why William G. got the hatemail. Most people can sluff off criticism of their favorite comics. He didn't get the hatemail because of what he said about the comics themselves. He became an asshole when he said this about PvP and Penny-Arcade:

If they came out today, they wouldn't be as popular as they are.

That's not a critique of those comics, it's a critique about their fans. It's one thing to criticize the comic itself, but he was insinuating that these thousands of readers are ignorant...That if they knew any better, they wouldn't be reading these comics. He personally insulted every reader of Penny Arcade and PvP Online.

That's why when he complains about the "fanboys", he's either an idiot or a liar. If he's an idiot, he can't see that there exist types of comics that don't merely exist on art alone. If he's a liar, than he's still insulting these audiences whenever he spews the word "fanboy", and he's insulting them because he loathes the type of person who reads webcomics for anything else than arthouse eliteism.

Personally, I think he's just an idiot. Remember, there is no such thing as bad publicity. He must have had a huge readership after the "PA/PvP Incident" and instead of doing anything useful with that, he closed the blog. Then he started showing up everywhere, leaving little bits of trolling wherever he went. The man simply has had nothing of any substance to say since the incident. He also hasn't produced any more art. Had he been smart, he would have made fun of PA and PvP in comic form, but I really think the man has no real sense of humor.

What William G. needs to do is apologize to the readers of PvP and Penny Arcade. Then he needs to drop the curmudgeon persona.

Thursday, October 20, 2005

David Brin is the Man

Sci-Fi author David Brin has a not-so-well-known blog where he posts basically what are huge essays broken up into blog-post sized posts. He started with a three-month-long series on Modernism and it's enemies that was breathtaking and recently followed it up with a series on gerrymandering.

Yesterday's post though, mirrors a lot of the thoughts that have been going through my own mind recently about wealth and liberalism. Sometimes, I feel like Brin spends too much time trying to be a "centrist", but this post is a spectacular takedown of the economics of the Right...

We have been told all our lives that socialism is the chief enemy of markets. Hm, well, that was true for a little while, I guess. Indeed, Ronald Reagan was right to call the Soviet Union an "evil empire." But for how long? From 1917 to 1989?

Big deal!

For most of the rest of human history -- 99% of urban cultures -- the great enemy of accountability and market systems consisted of conspiratorial aristocratism. The deliberate collusion of those with power, money and influence to take over the organs of the state and use the state's power to enforce their family privileges. Their right to cheat and own other people. And then to ensure those privileges would be inherited. This happened so consistently, across all cultures, that it must be one of the core human traits that modern civilization is challenged to overcome.

Seriously, conservative friends, look over the paragraph above and try your best to evade it.

That's it. Right there. Look at the current Republican party. Look at the current Administration. They are the new arristocrats. Rich, white, male, wealthy. They have spent the last several decades making America safe for serfdom. The rich lower taxes on themselves and ensure that the cost of living increases for everyone else. They make more money while we pay more for education, housing, food, healthcare, and transportation. They squeeze the middle class and squash the poor. They make debt easy to aquire and hard to pay off. These guys are neo-Randian followers of a sort of revived version of Social Darwinism. Now the poor don't deserve help because they don't deserve it...They don't have the "determination" and they don't do the "hard work".

The new Social Darwinists have done a very effective job of propagandizing their vision so that the middle class will accept it. Welfare and Affirmative Action become "socialism". They demonize the Europeans and they push nationalism.

Back to Brin:

Go ahead. Ask some of today's "insatiable-style" aristos and propertarian mystics how they can support tax cuts for the rich in good times and in hard times...

...tax cuts for the rich during peace and during war. Tax cuts during huge deficits and tax cuts during surplus...

...tax cuts to "supply side" us into prosperity through investment in research and factories...

... and then -- when the aristocracy demonstrably does not invest their tax gifts in capital -- they switch to "demand side" justifications, calling for yet more tax cuts, so that the aristocracy can spend it all on employment-generating toys.

(Hint, the last thirty years have shown that direct tax cuts to the rich are just about the LEAST effective economic stimulation of any kind. Proportionate to any other social class, they do not spend. (Hence their support of consumption taxes.) And they do not invest in risky factories or startups. (Venture capital languished even as the Bush cuts sent torrents into wealthy pockets.) They most certainly do no research! In fact, they mostly use any fresh infusion of money simply to be richer.)

When you probe through all the contradicting justifications for this universal rationalization of tax cuts for the rich - especially refusing to pay when your country is at war - the surface reasons all unravel and you'll easily get to the reductio answer.

"It's not the government's money. It's my money."

Try it and see. These old-fashioned aristocrats (and their apologist ideologues) are generally pretty honest about it, after a good push, readily admitting that "supply side" and all the other flummeries were just window dressing. To them, "it's our money" is a deeply-felt and indignantly moral position. A platonic essence, grounded on a purely self-referential axiom. And, like all axioms, it is not subject to question or doubt.

Also (like so many fellow hypocrites on the left) they refuse to ever consider how wonderfully convenient it all is. That their principled, moral stand just happens to support their own, personal self interest.

What a coincidence.

Heh...I've spoken to people like that. Thank You, David Brin, for telling it like it is.

A Troll Explodes

The world of web comics is filled with tons of interesting and diverse personalities. In any diverse population, you'll find some scum-sucking pigs who are utterly full of themselves.

99% of the time, these people are an utter annoyance to society. That last 1% of the time, they throw a supernova-like hissy fit and for one brief moment outshine every other talentless hack in a giant explosion of diahrea-like whining.

Tonight, webcomic asshat William G. is shining in the night's sky.

You may remember William G. from the time, several months ago, he wrote an epic blog post that claimed that PvP and Penny Arcade were subpar for various spurious reasons...It seemed like the center-piece of his post was that he disliked PvP and Penny Arcade because they were popular, not because of anything in the strips. His measure for webcomic quality was, it seemed , his own work that no one has ever read. He was then burried under a pile of furious emails from PvP and PA readers (ha!). This was followed by a period of intense whining about "fanboys" and finally he simply depublished the post, thus commiting the ultimate act of online cowardice.

Since that time he has become the sewer rat of the webcomic world, showing up in various forums and blog post comments to make postings that have obvious troll-like and attention-whore tendancies which a high degree of whine-osity.

Which brings us to this week. In a recent Blank Label podcast, Scott Kurtz was asked about the Webcomics Examiner article series that did a review of his work, one that William G. was involved in and basically said nothing of substance.

First, Kurtz said a few negative things about Webcomics Examiner. Personlly, I disagree with him, and Eric "Websnark" Burns does a far better job of explaining that. But then, Kurtz tears William G apart. It's a beautiful and heartfult moment when a troll gets torn a new one. I encourage you to listen to the whole thing.

Inevitably, William G. heard about this, and had the oh-so-predictable reaction of undergoing silicon fusion and having his rotten iron troll core implode...

Here's William G. going supernova:

Okay, I put the reviewing behind me. The people had spoken, and they didnt want to know what I thought of certain webcomics, they just wanted me to cheer them along in their tastes. I heard it, got sick of the harassment from some corners, and tried to move on.

Then I got a transcript from a podcast where Straub and Kurtz go off on the Webcomics Examiner and myself in particular.

Well, fuck both you over-bloated, self-serving fanboys. You've just made me determined to get back into webcomic commentary. And if you (incorrectly) thought I was just being mean the last time, you aint seen me when I actually am angry

Eric Myers has the transcript here. One of the things that bugs me about it, not just that Kristopher Straub told a pretty blatant lie about Modern Humour Authority... he's been habitually lying about it for a few years now, I figure he can't help himself... it's that Scott Kurtz all but claims that he's not very smart.

This is an intensely beautiful moment. This scum-eater is a classic example of trollism/tin-foil syndrome.

Exhibit 1: Accusing people of harrasment, when in fact they;re just reacting to his own acidic personality.
Exhibit 2: Calling people fanboys. This is classic..You're not the problem, the "fanboys" are.
Exhibit 3: The "I'll be back" BS. You never "left", you just became a troll in other places than your own blog.
Exhibit 4: Accusing other, more successful and much funnier webcomic arists of lying.

William G. has just become the Richard Hogland of webcomics.

Friday, October 14, 2005

Jack Shafer is the Man

Jack Shafer, editor-at-large and media critic at Slate captures one moment of perfect beauty:

I don't hate Apple. I don't even hate Apple-lovers. I do, however, possess deep odium for the legions of Apple polishers in the press corps who salute every shiny gadget the company parades through downtown Cupertino
as if they were members of the Supreme Soviet viewing the latest ICBMs at the May Day parade.

YES. Oh how I covet this paragraph and wish I had wrote it. This is like that moment when you finally see the arrow in the FedEx logo; the moment of clarity and understanding. "Deep odium" perfectly describes what I feel. It's as if a haze has lifted and I can finally describe what I see. Thank you Mr. Shafer, for this moment of clarity.

Thursday, October 13, 2005

Underwhelming

What's my reaction to today's announcements by Apple concerning a video iPod and video in the iTunes Music Store?

Underwhelming.

Buying videos in the iTunes Music Store makes very little sense right now. $2 music videos...whoop-dee-do...Fairly low res TV episodes that are oh-so-easy to Tivo (and aquire by other means)...whoop-dee-do.

Video in iTunes kinda makes sense (as a video organizing app), but the execution sucks. Open a movie and it starts playing in the album art area which is located in a tiny box in the corner of the screen. If you set it to play video in its own window the video keeps playing audio in iTunes after you close the window...That makes no sense whatsoever. I think MS figured this stuff out in 1996 or so...iTunes should play videos the same way music videos work in the music store: Put them in the main pane.

Even more disturbing is the fact that iTunes does not recognize AVIs in any way. That's like not supporting MP3s. 99% of the content I'd like to organize is in the form of AVIs rather than Quicktime. I know Apple likes to imagine that QT is the last video format on Earth, but not at least providing transcoding fascilities for AVIs seriously limits the usefulness of iTunes as a video organizer...Of course, the probably reason the left transcoding out is that it's is deadly slow (compared to simply converting a song from one format to another) and AVI transcoding facilities would allow pirated content to be easily put on the video iPod.

The video iPod unit itself is also underwhelming. Next to the PSP's breathtaking 4.3 inch widescreen LCD, the iPod video's 4:3, 2.5 inch display is old hat. The aspect ratio tells me that Apple is not too serious about portable video right now...Rather, I think this is a panic move by Apple to get something into the portable video market before it's too late.

I can't accept the explanation that Apple is doing this simply because everyone expected a video-capable iPod...No, they have far more urgent reasons for getting into portable video.

First, the cellular providers are all ready to start streaming full-frame video content to phones. Portable, on demand video is a scary prospect for Apple because compared to streaming, the online music store model sucks. There's no need for people to be stuck with giant DRMed music files sucking up space on their hard drives when it gets streamed right to their phone.

The second reason is the Sony PSP and it's UMD video format. As a competitor to today's video iPod, the PSP is an above average hobbyist's toy...If you invest in a large memory card, you can fill it with videos you transcode on your PC and transfer over. But that's not what concerns Apple...The UMD movie format must scare them half to death.

Think about it...What was the last portable video format you saw? Unlike music, we've never had a real portable video medium until UMD. Not only do UMD movies look good, and work well, but the MPAA didn't flinch at approving it because it's the natural portable extention of DVD...No Hollywood content sitting on hard drives waiting to be cracked open.

Sure, carrying around discs does lack the slickness of the iTunes Music Store, but how slick would the store be when you're downloading 400MB+ video files? Consider that UMDs store the video at full DVD resolution, which undoubtely means that a future device will allow them to be played back at full res...How will Apple compete when Sony's format already has 1GB+ movies?

The other thing that bugs me is how we went from iTunes 5 to iTunes 6 in a handful of weeks. Something tells me that all the iTunes work was done for some time, but something (perhaps legal, perhaps iPod design related) delayed the release of the version of iTunes with the video support. It makes sense considering how barren iTunes 5 was in the new features department.

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Mitch Albom May Be The Perfect Punchline

Seen on Metafilter...The most interesting pieces of pop music trivia (that you know are 100% false.)

Starship's "We Built This City" was actually written by future sports columnist and "Tuesdays With Morrie" author Mitch Albom.


Friday, October 07, 2005

Hypothesis

Hypothesis: The Flaming Lips can heal all wounds.

NOTE TO SELF: Do not seriously test this hypothesis.

PS: Parapa pa pap...Parapa pa pa pa pa pa...

Sunday, October 02, 2005

Quote of the Day

As seen on the Gaming-Age Forum...

Santo: "I don't understand girls. They make absolutely no sense and are impossible to read."

Fix: "That's because you're supposed to read them like they're written in braile."

Monday, September 26, 2005

Richard Dawkins is the Man

Occasionally I read "The Shape of Days", a blog by a Battlestar Galactica fan who is also a right-wing/social darwinist asshat. Not suprisingly, he's from Texas. Today, he flings his warm poo of seething rage at this excellent satire piece by Richard Dawkins. I think Dawkins just moved from "awesome" to "hero" status in my book.

Thursday, May 05, 2005

Quote of the Day

From a commenter at The Old New Thing:

Meh, what are you on, man? Raymond is a lvl 900 ninja coder. He could cast a 1200 damage VC++ spell as an afterthought. Also, he knows Itanium assembly. Pour out your Haterade.

Wednesday, May 04, 2005

Quote of the Day

Matthew Yglasias, guest blogging at Talking Points Memo:

Social Security now, Social Security tomorrow, Social Security forever!



Tuesday, May 03, 2005

Quote(s) of the Day

QotD #1: Fark Headline:

Cream reunites in concert. For those of you under 40: Cream was Eric Clapton's old band. Under 30: Clapton was once a big rock star. And for you under 20: Rock was a kind of music they used to play on the radio


QotD #2: Sci-Fi author David Brin:

Remember the basic philosophy here, folks. Most of you would have been burned at the stake 400 years ago. I know I would have. Nowadays, that is a compliment. Let's KEEP this a civilization in which that's a compliment.

Stay burnable.

Jackass(es) of the Day

Jackass #1: Sci-Fi writer Orson Scott Card

The original "Star Trek," created by Gene Roddenberry, was, with a few exceptions, bad in every way that a science fiction television show could be bad. Nimoy was the only charismatic actor in the cast and, ironically, he played the only character not allowed to register emotion.


Jackass #2: Webcomic artist/reviewer William G

I saw a link for the Web Cartoonists Choice Awards again. I know everyone always complains about it every year because all of the Megatokyo and Penny Arcade fanboys supposidly register and "stuff the ballot boxes". Where unsung heroes like Ghastly go un-noted.

But I think one of the best ways to prevent this possibility from happening is for everyone who actually likes webcomics as a medium, and not just the comics that pander to your pet obsessions, should register and try to influence the voting towards what you think is a good webcomic.

Monday, May 02, 2005

Well Isn't This Cool...

I was going to make a post about how much the websites of most commercial AM stations suck, but then I stumbled upon this. It's a lengthy, detailed document on WLS's website about how to get the best reception, written by their chief engineer. Rather cool. Wow, they even have a coverage map. Every radio station website needs one of those. It just kinda makes sense.

Monday, April 25, 2005

The Weather Sucks

So, remember back on March 30th when I was tingling with joy at the prospect of Spring arriving with 70+ degree weather? Well, that didn't last. Now, it's 35 outside and today I had to walk through tons of fluffy, cold slush falling from the sky to get lunch. Great big gobs of slush. In late April. That's a crime. Daylight Savings Time + Snow is like one those thought puzzles that makes your brain hurt.

In other news, I'm totally ready for Summer Break (which is 1/3rd in Spring, ever notice that?...Schools bend reality to fit their needs). I can't wait to get home and blast my tunes in my own room on my nice hifi stuff.

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

The Onion Brings the Bacon

Pope Emerges From Chrysalis A Beautiful Butterfly

Alas, Megatokyo

I love webcomics. They're practically the reason I get out of bed in the morning. I've never really gotten into comic books (aside from some Star Trek comics years ago) and newspaper "funnies" are not a big part of my existance, but web comics bring me such joy. Penny Arcade, PvP, Real Life, the hillariously awesome Questionable Content, Queen of Wands, Todd and Penguin, Mac Hall, Diesel Sweeties, Perry Bible Fellowship, Wigu/Overcompensating, and others make it clear to me that we have witnessed the birth of something special here.

A few years ago, Megatokyo would have been on that list. Megatokyo, after Penny Arcade, was one of the first webcomics I really got into. PA, demonstrated the potential of the medium. Megatokyo introduced the potential for plot. Back then, I loved it. It was constantly funny, basking in gamer and anime culture while simultaenously mocking both of them. The first two years were brilliant. And then, as they say, everything changed.

Honestly, the last time I enjoyed a Megatokyo strip was October 24th, 2004. I know because I blogged about it. That's kinda sad. Not only has it sucked since then, but the reason I blogged about it is because for one brief, shining moment, it stopped the streak of sucking that it had been on for such a long time. What a loss. A few years ago, I was a huge MT fan. I still have, and often sleep under, the MT Sad Kimiko blanket.

It's pretty clear that this descent from greatness started with the departure of Rodney "Largo" Caston (which, like all things is detailed at Wikipedia). In the beginning, MT was funny, it moved fast (they got drunk and mistakenly get stuck in Tokyo in the space of what, two, three strips?), and it had an energy and a vibrance to it. Then Caston left. Today, the strip is a shell of what it was in 2002. Basically, in the 2.5 to 3 years since that time, nothing has happened plot wise in the strip. It's become this long meandering narrative that goes nowhere. Whoop-de-do Kimiko's finally on the radio. Didn't Piro show a sketch of that somewhere like, years ago? Something (I'm not sure what) finally happened with Largo and Erika. This took years.

Let me put this into perspective: Babylon 5, which has an immensly complicated plot, took five years. Megatokyo has been around five years. If B5 moved at the speed that MT did, the pilot episode would still be going. How do you go five years with so little plot development!?!?!? Truly, this astounds me. How far has Piro and Kimiko's relationship come since she spilled coffee on him in October, 2000. Almost nothing. A date perhaps? Nah. Some sort of relationship? Nah. We finally found out that Miho had met Piro and Largo in a game online, and was cheating or something. Come to think of it, that's all we know about her. That, and she has some illness. We've basically learned nothing. The whole point of a mysterious character is to remove the mystery. Back when Yuki had Piro's sketchbook, that was cool...She was the only character in the strip, besides Seraphim, that could really see into Piro's head. Now, all we get of her is Piro constantly missing his drawing lesson with her. Seriously how much longer can that stupid plot go on for? Honestly, glaciers move faster than this.

This didn't happen overnight. After Caston left, there was still Great Teacher Largo. There were still the hillarious catoons with Makoto, the server, being kidnapped. The whole disaster squad thing was funny. Ed and Dom were funny. Ping and her various oddities was great. But slowly, all of that faded away. I think Piro, working on his own, lost the point of his own strip. He's caught between the all-consuming urge to have this relationship angle take over the strip, while at the same time he keeps the characters set in ice, never changing or evolving. That does not work in a plot. The author has to let go and let the characters evolve, else things become boring and tedious, as MT has.

Monday's Penny Arcade demonstrates what it would be like if Tycho banished Gabe and turned PA into his own creation. The results are pretty horrendous. What you see there is the author's personality, ever nuance of his subconcious amplified to Disaster Area proportions, and that's why it's funny. I don't know if this was supposed to be a commentary on Megatokyo, but it perfectly explains what Megatokyo has become: A Fred Gallagher ego trip. The heart and soul of that comic are gone. It's no longer remotely interesting. The dialog has become totally incomprhensable. The plot seems totally lost.

The magic is gone.