BGNews Thing #1: President's Day Hillarity

Right-Wing BGNews columnist Alan Calcaterra writes some hillarious shit, I must say. Today, he wrote what starts out being a perfectly innocuous column about President's Day facts:

President's Day is today, and most people think this is a meaningless holiday.

It actually does have a lot of meaning because it was created for the celebration of all the presidents of the United States.

Originally, George Washington's birthday and Abraham Lincoln's birthday were two separate federal holidays in February until 1968, when Congress passed the Uniform Holidays Bill.

The bill, however, didn't become effective until 1971, combining Washington's and Lincoln's birthdays into one day called President's Day. It exists to honor all presidents and it is celebrated on the third Monday of February.

See?...Good wholesome President's Day fun. But, Alan is a right-wing blowhard, and that means that on President's Day, he has an irresistable temptation to start worshipping Ronald Reagan. It's like a moth drawn to a flame. So, lets go to the next page...

TBN, which is the most-watched religious network according to the Neilson ratings, is airing the award-winning documentary "In the Face of Evil: Reagan's War in Word and Deed," which is about Ronald Reagan and the 40-year campaign against the Soviet Union and communism.

Oh, there it goes...This is actually a triple word score for Alan, because he mentions TBN, Reagan, and communism in the same sentence. It's like a reactionary shish kabob.

The film has been getting great reviews and broke box office records in multiple cities when it was released in 2004.

It is considered one of the best documentaries on Reagan and the Cold War, and TBN is expecting high ratings for this President's Day feature.

The documentary is based on Peter Schweizer s best-selling novel "Reagan's War: The Epic Story of His Forty Year Struggle and Final Triumph Over Communism." This book is best known for saying that Reagan achieved the final victory over the Soviet Union through direct confrontation.

So, in honor of all of the presidents, go see a right-wing propaganda film today!...

I consider him to be the greatest president of the 20th century. His contribution to ending the Cold War and fighting communism was one of the biggest victories ever in U.S. history because it was the first time the U.S. fought against a superpower with nuclear weapons.

O RLY? FDR says hi.